May 14th, 2008
And so we suffer…
I was up last night, silently crying for my brother who’s going through a life changing trial right now.
Although I’m not surprised by the latest family news, it really didn’t make it any easier when I lay my head on the pillow, in the dark silence, with all the thoughts allowed to run wild in my head.
What will happen to my brother. It is him who I worry about most. Will he come home to us? To his family that loves him no matter what and are ready to support him through this dark time in his life? Has it been such a long time away that he forgets we are here? Although he’s not one to talk. None of the men in my family are. It’s very frustrating.
I wish I could have good heart to heart talks with my brothers. My sisters all wear their hearts on their sleeves. There is no guessing involved.
If my brother was the type to listen, the type to respond to conversation, I would tell him that it’s going to be okay. It’s going to work out. We love him, we’re here for him. Please ask if you need something. Please don’t try to get through this alone.
And I know that it hurts and it will for a long, long time. But don’t let this make you bitter, my brother.
I love you so much. I want happiness for you.
I cry for you, and if you know the women in this family, you know we all do.
Good Enough
I too have a brother that has strayed. We’ll just say that his parole is almost over and leave it at that. It’s heart wrenching to watch. Keep praying for him. Keep trying to reach out. Hopefully one day he’ll respond to your efforts. I know that’s what I hope for my own brother.
Men are an interesting breed. Prideful macho-ness can seem to them like the strong route, but ironically, it’s vunerable humility that comes from and brings us strength. May he come to understand your love and pure concern for him soon.
~TTL
It sure is a hard spot to be in. I shed many tears over my younger sister. Things are better now, but it is so painful to no be able to “do” or “be”…. but wait… May there be signs of hope as you wait.
Sometimes all it takes is for someone to know that they are loved. And it sounds like your brother is loved.
Good luck!